Thursday, January 05, 2006
It was a terrible day today, I guess my days are always horrible.Counting this time, I have cried 4 times already! In less than 24 hrs! The emotions didnt come suddenly to me , you know.Someone triggered it.I AM NOT SUFFERING FROM PSYCHOLOGICAL PAIN!!!!I can tell the difference,it is not a fine line apart.You think I enjoy feeling pain all the time?You think I want to feel this pain all the time?No and a dozen times no! I dont enjoy the pain and I also dont like people pitying me!
I am like all others, I do fear feeling pain , but what can I do?It cant be psychological pain.This kind of pain didnt change the least bit since I was sec 2.I didnt remembered being very unhappy before I first started my back problem.No. I cant remember anything that happen when I was happy , it felt so much it was like one ortwo decade ago. Yeah, my sec three year was the longest in my whole damn life.Pain, despair, darkness, depressed ,weariness, hopelessness,worthless.The living just isnt my world.The dead is.
I am like all others, I do fear feeling pain , but what can I do?It cant be psychological pain.This kind of pain didnt change the least bit since I was sec 2.I didnt remembered being very unhappy before I first started my back problem.No. I cant remember anything that happen when I was happy , it felt so much it was like one ortwo decade ago. Yeah, my sec three year was the longest in my whole damn life.Pain, despair, darkness, depressed ,weariness, hopelessness,worthless.The living just isnt my world.The dead is.
i know that i have loved you ... at 1/05/2006 08:52:00 pm
fate crumbled all around 0 identities
fate crumbled all around 0 identities