Saturday, February 11, 2006
Eh.
Sad again.
How?
Stupid of me thinking about the past.
Out of my head will you?
I want some peace and quiet.
Dont want to remember that the third time I went to hospital,
Yuquan and Shirley message me and offer to chit chat with me.
Dont want to remember that Eunice wanted to rush to hospital last year hearing I was hurt.
Shut up and get lost.
Dont want to remember.
At least not now.
Don't talk to me and ignored me after that.
Don't leave without telling me the reason.
Don't ever ever make me break down the barrier if you want me to seal myself in.
I've promised and I will fulfil it.
I've promised and I would fulfil it.
I 've promised and I must fulfil it.
Sometimes,
I don't ever think they should even give me a reason.
Because
If gods really existed ,they won't have given scum like me such nice friends.
So,
they should have never come into my life.
Yeah.
It is such a big mistake.
Sometimes,
I don't want to make choices.
Eh. I am tired.
Tired of facing the consequences of my decisions.
All the decisions I made are always wrong.
Everyone just wants me to walk out of it.
Stop trying to hide in a little shell,
stop running away when things get tough
stop shoving everyone out.
shoving?
Is there anyone I can shove out?
hahaz.They just all walked out on me.
Like my senior.
I dont want counsellors.
I am not crazy.
I am prone to suicidal but I am not crazy.
My back pain ISNT a psychological problem.
That reminds me why I dislike counsellors.
Not matter what you gonna say wont help me the least bit.
why?
Cant pass through a day without feeling gulity.
Feeling its all my fault.
Cant pass a day without blaming myself.
I am just worthless and useless.
Not comparable to trash becasue trash is too good for me.
haiz
i know that i have loved you ... at 2/11/2006 11:22:00 pm
fate crumbled all around 0 identities
fate crumbled all around 0 identities