Saturday, April 05, 2008
I realised that there is nothing else to do but to remain angry with you because when I don't, I will miss you and it will hurt.
I didn't know anything.
Didn't know that they were angry.
Wanted to tell you that it came as a shock to me.
I thought they understood so I thought I need not do so.
I really thought so..
I really didn't know.
I thought they just didn't like me, never had questioned why.
Perhaps...
What could I do even if I knew?
My actions betrayed cool logic.
But is love really logical?
If you must harm someone, would you choose that someone to be yourself or someone you love?
I just chose not to harm others.
You can judge me all you want with your myopic outlook of life.
I am as satisfied as you are that we have nothing to do with each other.
Just don't take away anything from me with your judgement.
Just don't take that.
It means something to me.
It really means something to me.
Logic would tell you that my actions proved that I was lying.
Then that same logic would even tell you that an arrogant person would not victimised oneself because it would diminish others perspection of one's invulnerability.
I am proud, so proud till I could not apologise to you without appearing angry,
so proud till people could even comment that I was angry with you even though I was about to apologise, so proud till I was lack of sincerity.
One day, if you ever seen this post,
I want to thank you for opening my eyes to everything.
I thank you for my grades because I will work even harder to forget everything again.
I want to dull myself with work in school.
Because being angry needs a lot of effort.
And it's harmful to my health and studies.
Good luck to you too and I will always keep you in prayer.
When I told you I cared for you three times,
it meant that I trusted you,
that you are not another pawn I used,
that you mean alot to me.
At least, still at this point of time.
I didn't know anything.
Didn't know that they were angry.
Wanted to tell you that it came as a shock to me.
I thought they understood so I thought I need not do so.
I really thought so..
I really didn't know.
I thought they just didn't like me, never had questioned why.
Perhaps...
What could I do even if I knew?
My actions betrayed cool logic.
But is love really logical?
If you must harm someone, would you choose that someone to be yourself or someone you love?
I just chose not to harm others.
You can judge me all you want with your myopic outlook of life.
I am as satisfied as you are that we have nothing to do with each other.
Just don't take away anything from me with your judgement.
Just don't take that.
It means something to me.
It really means something to me.
Logic would tell you that my actions proved that I was lying.
Then that same logic would even tell you that an arrogant person would not victimised oneself because it would diminish others perspection of one's invulnerability.
I am proud, so proud till I could not apologise to you without appearing angry,
so proud till people could even comment that I was angry with you even though I was about to apologise, so proud till I was lack of sincerity.
One day, if you ever seen this post,
I want to thank you for opening my eyes to everything.
I thank you for my grades because I will work even harder to forget everything again.
I want to dull myself with work in school.
Because being angry needs a lot of effort.
And it's harmful to my health and studies.
Good luck to you too and I will always keep you in prayer.
When I told you I cared for you three times,
it meant that I trusted you,
that you are not another pawn I used,
that you mean alot to me.
At least, still at this point of time.
i know that i have loved you ... at 4/05/2008 11:54:00 pm
fate crumbled all around 0 identities
fate crumbled all around 0 identities